One day, but not today.

Friday 9th March 2018


Yes, It’s been a while since I broke my ‘journal a day’ commandment. Life, I have found in my 41 years of life on Earth to be the most reckoning force. It can dissolve the intentions of the most resolute person and powder the ambitions of the strongest individual.

Life gets in the way of the most sincere souls but it always wrecks havoc on mothers and people who are selfless. There is no prize for guessing who wins when there is a choice to be made between fulfilling a commitment and taking care of a sick child. As a mother I am used to putting my ambitions aside to focus on the needs of my children, even on the rare occasions I sleep in during a fever I am ravaged by guilt.

I have been known to collapse from exhaustion but you’ll see me smile and rise when I see my children call out for me. There is a power that comes from self-sacrifice, an inner strength that makes you survive with no sleep and zero rest. When I look back to those years when I raised three little children, 4,2 and 1 years of age, all on my own, I stand in awe. Divine help is not far away when the cause is noble. It doesn’t matter if you believe in God or not when you cause is worthwhile, help is always at hand. In my experience even the devil steps back when a mother cries for help, everyone respects a mama, even the demons.

Times like this I am forced to acknowledge that there is more to life than what we generally fathom. There are forces, unspoken guides, angels if you will who share our space as silent spectators. Sometimes, I wager, they even throw a few roadblocks just to let us know that they are here if only we would reach out.

But we prefer to stay cocooned in our little superficial worlds, with our little luxuries, our routines, our familiar ways that we fail to notice this other universe that coexists. When disaster strikes and jolts us out of our illusions we come face to face with the truth that we are not in control, this world is not the only truth that exists and for a brief moment in time we are vulnerable.

We see the light and we do what our seven billion-year-old mind does best, we either fight it or take flight from it, failing to grasp the truth that can literally set us free. Every successful person on earth who lives or has ever lived will attest to the fact that there is a higher power that governs, and aligning ourselves to it guarantees enlightenment.

Yet we resist the unknown, honed for survival we have incubated our freedom in the throes of ignorance. One day we will have to break through, we will have to embrace the unknown, one day.

Let me know what you think, after all we think therefore we are.. alive?

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